Can We Talk?
Maine middle school board decision, which would allow school authorities to distribute chemical contraceptives to eleven-year olds without parental consent, underscores the need for parents to communicate with their children about sex.

If more school authorities knew about The Parents Speak Up National Campaign, a nationwide program that empowers parents to talk to their children about sexuality, there may not have been the loud headlines and heated debates last week over the middle school news coming out of Portland, Maine. (See "Talk To Me" public service announcements at www.4parents.gov.)

In a decision that bordered on desperation, the Portland School Board voted to dispense contraceptives to middle school students (ages 11- 15) who request them. Although the committee rules require general parental consent for treatment, confidentiality laws would allow a preteen student to receive contraceptives from a school nurse without informing parents.

The idea of an 11-year-old girl on the pill was understandably a matter of concern to many parents and medical experts. Yet some commentators appeared on the morning talk shows to defend the practice, stating that if young girls are sexually active they should be given "protection" against pregnancy.

The Parents Speak Up National Campaign seeks to foster communication between parents and children over sexuality, a far more promising strategy than the apathetic and defeatist half-measures proposed by the Portland school system. The national campaign offers resources on its website for parents to open a healthy discussion with their kids about sexuality and relationships.

Research shows that parental attitudes and expectations about sexual behavior far outweigh peer pressure and the media in influencing teen sexual behavior. The message of "4parents.gov" empowers parents to open the discussion and have a positive impact on their children, even if they feel hesitant or helpless when the topic is sex.

The "4parents.gov" public service campaign begins with young people saying, "Dad. Mom. We gotta talk." It lets parents know that their children yearn for and value their viewpoint and guidance.

Healthy Respect is well-positioned to comment on the situation in the Portland, Maine, school system since we have been dealing with middle school students for the past four years in our character-based abstinence education curriculum. In our experience, preteens having sex points to deeper problems that contraceptives do not even begin to address.

Through its classroom-based curriculum that offers students the opportunity to learn about and discuss sensitive subjects with trained instructors, Healthy Respect gives young people the information they need and the self-confidence they want to make healthy choices.

Amid all the talk about Portland giving contraceptives to preteens, there has been little discussion of the following facts:

*Contraceptives such as the pill or IUD do not protect against the transmission of sexually transmitted infections that could ruin a young person's future.

*Contraceptives do not protect against the broken hearts or emotional problems that often come with early sexual activity.

*Contraceptives do not help students develop mature attitudes toward sexuality or healthy relationships.

*Contraceptives do not address the issue of what is lacking in the lives of middle school students that would drive them to become involved in sexual relationships at such an early age.

Commenting on the situation, Valerie Huber of the National Abstinence Education Association in Washington, D.C., stated, "What the Portland School Committee should consider are ways to teach students . . . the healthiest ways to build relationships and to set goals and boundaries for themselves. Abstinence education provides these kinds of pro-active methods."